Deck: RW TarotReading Intention: Past Present Future 3-Card Spread
Just some light background. m/28/NYC. I’ve had my tarot deck for some time now. Really just started using it about a month ago and have been really committed to understanding what the cards mean to me, building my connection to my deck. As well as how I may interpret + channel their message to it’s greatest ability.
I’ve been feeling so defeated lately so I decided to channel and ground my energy to understand my current situation. I gave myself a past, present and future spread so here’s my interpretation:
Past: 9 Of Cups (Reversed) – Great work comes with great appreciation but there's a difference between appreciating our journey's success and being arrogant about it. I believe it alludes to Arrogance and pride// unhappiness and no fulfillment. Maybe more so overindulgence. A criticism and cause of conflict for my family and I, is that they believe I would rub my accomplishments in everyone's face (which I might sometimes), or that I may have self serving purposes (not really). But because I do so well and accomplish a lot I want to make everyone feel equally part of my success and then I do get upset when they don't want to celebrate or take part. I used to feel like because I wasn't getting validation from my family for my personal win's that they weren't really wins in my book. That's been a recurring theme in my life. ("LOOK AT ME MOM, DAD LOOK WHAT I CAN DO IM TALENTED IM TALENTED" -think of it like that)
Before 2021 closed, I left the temple I had been an active member and apart of for 4 years as well. There were lies being said about me along with other unnecessary drama with the lady who ran it. I wasn't going to fight someone else for their healing. I knew I could never grow spiritually in a place where I had no trust. No trust=no future. Up to that point, my lifestyle was me overcompensating for my accomplishments. I treated my wins like a sore winner. I just wouldn't allow myself to be satisfied or content. So to combat the feeling I would just indulge, and justify over indulging as a means to an end. My past shows a lack of moderation and not keeping things in control. I have been overindulgent, gaining weight, eating to cope. I had finally made the decision to lose weight and get back on track with my health a few months ago (going well btw). Maybe the 9 of cups is telling me that my constant need of validation along with my overindulgent careless lifestyle was a hindrance to my well being. The pain from lack of validation stopped me from appreciating my accomplishments but instead antagonize them. The lesson of my past is to appreciate my accomplishments for what they are and not what they should be.
Present: The Chariot ( Upright)- The Chariot represents my inner momentum. My focus and drive to meet my life goals. One of them for a long time being my sound health, mental, physical , and spiritual. Listening to my intuition and understanding that a goal isn’t a goal on sheer determination alone. It all requires the drive to action, inspired continuity, and solid routine. My current situation is telling me to trust my intuition and not falter on where I see myself spiritually, physically & mentally. Over the past few months, I've taken control of my life back to how I see fit. I've joined a new temple where I feel welcome and accepted and appreciated. I feel so much energy and vibrancy. I've decluttered. I keep myself active and busy. I feel strong and determined to go after what I want and that my obstacles can't stop me. I remind myself that progress is a struggle; for the sake of myself and what I've been through I must continue to press on.
**I’m very glad to see this card as I am a Cancerian as well. **
Future: The Hanged Man (Upright) I believe that the Hanged Man is alluding me to my future; it will be a different outlook. My viewpoints and my outlooks will change perspective. A forced waiting period, is not a stagnation period. Just like the chariot has been building me up in my present with willpower and action and a solid foundation to move forward. That same structure will teach me to have discipline as the Hanged Man teaches. Inner self, insight. Maybe I’ll have to wait for what I really want for myself. And in that period of quiet chaos, my spiritual views, my journey in all aspects are meant to be insightful yet expansive. Not to be afraid but to be one with the greater change that’s to follow this waiting period.
** I can’t ignore both the Chariot, and Hanged Man. Both Major Arcana, and both point to major life events. I do understand it could represent a sacrifice from myself for the greater good of myself. I am still not sure, how to interpret it correctly. Maybe it means that the waiting period from the Hanged man will allow me to use my will power effectively to face whatever is coming. Maybe it could be settling down and enjoying the work and effort I've put in to my goals. **
*Please feel free to add your interpretations as well because I know I might not be able to fully understand what the cards are telling me. This reading is a tad bit confusing.
Also sorry for the long rant **
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