Confusing Reading (pls help)
I recently did a reading on my relationship with my boyfriend. I have been overthinking a lot and I have severe anxiety and OCD so it hasn’t been helping. My overthinking is mainly the fear that he is going to leave and/or cheat on me. I shuffled the cards and the main cards that showed up showed marriage, happy endings and commitment. After the reading I continued to shuffle just to see and the death card came out which of course confused me. i asked for clarification on the death card and the 3 of swords came out. I am genuinely very confused. Is it because I am emotionally invested in the question and have been overthinking about it? Is the deck just showing what I’m overthinking and fearing?
The next day after that reading I decided to meditate and calm myself before hand and did the spread again. The spread still showed signs of marriage and commitment but the 3 of swords still came out and 7 of swords? it’s leading me to believe that it’s showing what I’m fearing? I’m trying to interpret it in a different way instead of just spiraling completely but can anyone try and explain this to me? does the 3 of swords specifically represent a break up or does it represent other things?
Another thing I noticed is that when I start to get anxious when doing a reading on myself basically when I shuffle the deck that cards fly out in clumps of like 15 cards or like the deck just kinda falls apart in my hand and the cards stick to each other. And that did start to happen the first reading I did with the 3 of swords.
So can anyone explain any of this to me? thank you so much!